Some games are must haves despite not being the best quality games. For iOS there are a couple of those games that every gamer should own. Enviro-Bear 2010, Flick Kick Football and DrawRace are games that stay on my iPhone no matter what. All three are perfect to throw in the hands of someone not familiar with touch screen gaming. Now my perfect trio gets a new addition making it a full quartet of must haves for your device: QWOP for iOS.
The name QWOP is derived from the keys used to play the online flash version of the game. Basically QWOP is an overly simulated sports game where you have different track and field modes. What makes it the most challenging sports game ever invented is the fact that you have to control the entire body of QWOP. As QWOP supposedly is from my home in Scandinavia he has missed all training, and can’t even walk by himself.
The controls are horrible, horrendous, and utterly stupid. That is what makes QWOP one of the best games ever to grace the small screen. You have a dual thumb operated control scheme where you control the individual movements of QWOP. Tilting the device helps balancing him, but most of the time he falls over anyway. You can get really good at the game, but no one is close to the real life track and field records.
Initially you only have access to the 100 meter run, but if you manage to get a couple of meters into the track you unlock additional modes. 100 meter hurdles is painstakingly hard, as is steeplechase. The long jump is probably the most accessible mode due to the short length you have to run before the jump. The least accessible, and probably the hardest part of any game ever created is the 50 km walk. This mode, like the real thing, doesn’t let you lift both feet off the ground simultaneously. As I write this review not one single person has been able to beat it, and the current World Record in QWOP is 1542.3 meters. Having instant access to the current records through OpenFeint is excellent.
The presentation in QWOP is limited to a runner, and a track. Thankfully it is well made, and all limbs look realistic. I would have liked to have different skins, and outfits for QWOP to personalise him a bit. When you fall down you get a newspaper clip showing the last position, and some harsh comment in the headline. The audio is limited to the crowd shuffling about, meaty thuds as you fall and the odd groan from QWOP. You can play your own music alongside the sound effects.
QWOP is the kind of game everybody wants to play, and everybody can play it right away. Not successfully though, and that is what makes it so much fun. I have made a habit out of challenging all those around me with the following question:
“You might be great at management/golf/running/discussing(insert whatever is most suitable to the person), but can you actually walk?”
I have had students, gym teachers, and even my boss playing QWOP. Even those usually shying away from a challenge wants to give it a go, and laugh out loud doing it.
QWOP is not a great game, and I usually only play it to get a hang of running once in a while. I have never got the hang of running, and I keep laughing as QWOP falls in a funny way. This is just plain fun to play. If I ever had to make a true bang for the buck ratio calculation QWOP is the game the game giving the most fun for the amount it costs. Alongside the three games mentioned above it is a must have, and you will have fun no matter if you are into sports games or not. If you don’t like the game, you will still have fun watching your friends wrinkling their foreheads trying to walk.
QWOP for iOS $1.99
Seller: Bennett Foddy